


Dear John: The Supernatural Version

by supernatural_is_perfect



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-03
Updated: 2015-11-29
Packaged: 2018-04-02 15:02:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4064368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernatural_is_perfect/pseuds/supernatural_is_perfect
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You never expected to ever be happy again. Then a man saved your life. He was more than a man he was a hunter and the best of all the hunters, John Winchester. Will he be enough to fill all the empty spots in your life? Will he ever be able to accept you into his crazy life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lives saved

I cowered in the corner. I was the emptiness and yet still pain in its eyes. I knew it would try to kill me because I have seen that look not long before on someone else. I braced myself as it kept walking closer to me. I closed my eyes. I heard a gunshot. My eyes opened. The thing wasn’t there anymore, but there was a man walking towards me. He was unshaven and in a leather jacket. He looked shaggy but I felt like I could trust him.  
“How badly are you hurt?” He asked me.  
“Not too bad. What was-” I was interrupted.  
“Shhhhhh. It’s not dead. We have got to get you to my truck. Come on!” He said.  
I tried to stand but I fell.  
“I guess I’m more hurt then I thought.” I said.  
“Well, I guess I’ll carry you then.” He said.  
He picked me up as easy as a feather.  
“So, what’s your name?” He asked me.  
“It’s Y/N Y/L/N. What about you?” I asked in reply.  
“I’m John Winchester.” He said as we approached his big black truck. “I’m going to have to put you down to open the door. Just lean on me.”  
He put me down. I turned around and it was there and coming closer. I grabbed his arm and whispered.  
“Turn around!”  
He spun around and shot it once again.  
“It’s gone for the time being. Let’s get the hell out of here.” He said.  
He helped me in to the passenger seat them drove away fast.  
“What was that thing?” I asked before he had a chance to ask me another question.  
“It was a ghost.”  
“A ghost? I thought things like that were just fairytales.”  
“Nope. I don’t have time to give you the ‘things that go bump in the night are real speech’ right now but you saw it. You should believe your eyes.”  
“So, whose ghost was it?”  
“I think it was a woman named Amanda Dillon. Have you ever heard the name?”  
“No. I haven’t. Should I have?”  
“No, I just thought that if you have lived here for a while you might have heard some of the stories.”  
“I haven’t lived here long. So who was she?”  
“Before I answer your question I would like to ask one of my own. Why were you in that house anyways?”  
“I heard crying. It sounded like a child. I went to check it out to make sure everything was ok.”  
“Wow this is all starting to fall together. Amanda’s husband was an alcoholic and one night he came home really drunk and really broke. He started slicking and dicing his newborn. Amanda was sleeping in the upstairs room and didn’t hear the cries till it was too late. She came running down the stairs and tried to stop her husband in turn he killed her. The last thing she heard before she died was her child still crying. She just can’t let go.”  
“Well could you? But why is she trying to kill people?”  
“I don’t know?”  
“How do we stop her?”  
“We don’t. I do. You sit here until I come back.” He said as he pulled in to a crappy motel parking lot.  
“Umm ok but we just met and you want me to go in a motel room with you?”  
“Please just trust me for little bit longer. I will try to take care of this quickly then come back and tend to your injuries myself or take you to the hospital.”  
“Ok. I will just wait here then.”  
He carried me into room number 7. He laid me on the bed then put a line of salt in front of the door and both the windows. He gave me the remote to the TV and his phone number then left.  
His room was a mess. There were creepy cult books all over the place. He had a bag of weapons thrown on a chair. His bed was unmade. There were empty bottles of alcohol everywhere. His room was actually scaring me. I waited for him for a long time. He finally came back around two in the morning.  
“I almost forgot you were even here.” He said.  
“Yeah, well, I haven’t moved.” I said.  
“Still in pain?” He asked.  
“Yeah kinda.”  
“Hungary?”  
“Starving.”  
“Ok I’m going to check your injuries out then go get supply and food. Or do you want to go to the hospital?” He asked.  
“I just want to stay here if it’s all the same with you.” I replied.  
“It’s fine. So where are you hurt?”  
“Well you can see how screwed up my face is. My leg hurt really badly for a while but now I can’t feel it.”  
“What do you mean, can’t feel the pain or can’t feel it anymore at all?”  
“I can’t feel it at all.”  
“OK well I have to take a look at it. You can either take off your pants for a second or I could cut off the pant leg. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”  
“Ummmmmm, hard decision. I love these pants but I also just met you and you’re already asking to take my pants off?”  
“Wow your sassy for being hurt!”  
“I can’t feel it! I’m just going to take my pants off.”  
I tried taking them off by myself multiple times. I failed. Finally John helped me get them off without hurting my leg. I thought it would be weird but it wasn’t. It just felt like I was at the doctors. He examined my leg for a while.  
“Well I’m not a doctor but I was in the war and I’m pretty sure your hip is dislocated. I am going to have to relocate it. Bite down on this. I predict that it will hurt like hell.”  
He turned me on my side then pushed. It may have been the worst pain I ever felt. I thought I was going to pass out. I kept seeing spots of black.  
“Hey Y/N. Y/N, you ok? Y/N stay with me! Hey tell me about your family.” He said  
“Parents dead. Brothers want nothing to do with me.” I replied   
“Why not? You seem like a very kind sweet girl. Brave too.”   
“Not. Psychotic. Social anxiety. Unstable. Depressed.”  
“Well I never would have guessed.”  
“Yeah just shows how much you know me. I was actually really scared today. Weren’t you scared?” I said.  
“No. It’s my job.” John said.  
“So you like get paid to kill things like that?” I asked  
“Well, no. It’s just what I do.” John replied.  
“It sounds hard and unsafe.” I said.  
“Yeah. It is.” He said.  
“So how old are you?” I asked.  
“Old enough to be your father.” He said and chuckled.  
“So do you have any kids?” I asked.  
“Yeah two boys. They would like you.” John said.  
“Where are they?” I asked.  
“My oldest, Dean, he’s hunting somewhere else. Sam, the young one, he’s at Stanford.” John said.  
“Wow, Stanford! Smart kid. So Deans hunting, like you do?” I said.  
“Yeah. He’s a really good hunter, so is Sammy.” John said.  
“Why isn’t Dean with you?” I asked.  
“The older we get the less we want to be together.”  
“Oh, that’s sad. Are you married?”  
“I was. She was killed.”  
“By one of those ghost things?”  
“Yeah.”  
“You loved her very much, didn’t you?”  
“Yeah.”  
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring up split milk.”  
“It’s ok you should get some rest now. Let me take you home.”  
“No! I don’t want to go. Please let me go home.”  
“Ummm. Ok, but only one night.”  
“Thank you.”  
“You get the bed I get the floor.”  
“No I can’t let you sleep on the floor. I’m intruding, you take the bed.”  
“It is not up for discussion. Get in the bed.”  
“Ok”  
It took me forever to fall asleep. I kept waking up every hour with nightmares. I woke up screaming again around one in the morning.  
“Scoot over.” John said.  
I moved over and he got in to the bed and he wrapped his arms around me. I slept well the rest of the night. I woke up and it was midmorning. John was packing.  
“Are you leaving?” I asked.  
“Good morning. How did you sleep?” John asked.  
“Good. Are you packing?” I asked.  
“Were you dreaming about the hunt?” He asked.  
“No! Are you leaving me here?” I asked.  
“Then what did you dream about?” John asked turning to look me in the eyes.  
“John Winchester answer my question! Are you leaving?” I yelled.  
“Yes. I have to move on to the next job. What did you have nightmares about?” He said.  
“John Winchester please don’t leave me here. Please I can’t go back.” I begged.  
“Go back to what? Y/N Y/L/N what can’t you go back to?” John asked grabbing my arm.  
“Him. The ghost didn’t hurt me. He did.” I said turning away from John.  
“Y/N. Who hurt you? Tell me!” John said putting his hands on my shoulders.  
“John, John… if I tell you, you promise you won’t hurt him or tell anyone.” I said.  
“I can’t promise, but I need to know. You need to tell someone. “John said.  
“He is my boyfriend. We have been living together for almost a year. He was sweet and then he turned violent. I just accepted it. Then he started leaving marks. He made me quit working. I wasn’t allowed to go out unless he was with me. He wanted me to have his children; I refused. He attacked me. I ran away as fast as I could. I hid in the old house. I tried to be quite. Then that thing showed up. I thought I was dead I hoped I was. Then you showed up and my life got a hell of a lot better. I felt hope for the first time in a long time. And now you’re leaving me.” I said.  
“Do you have a safe place you can go?” John asked letting me go.  
“No I have no one, nowhere.” I said.  
“Ok. You can come with me. Just stay out of my way.” John said.


	2. Hunter Training of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John teaches you what it means to be a hunter and what you are supposed to do with your heart.

I had been living with John for almost a month. We lived in cheap hotels. I hardly ever went outside. One night after a hunt he came home bruised and bloody.  
“Y/N, this weekend we are going to Bobby’s to teach you basic hunting skills so you can at least have a chance of helping me if I get in to trouble.”  
I agreed. We got in the car and drove for about 6 hours. We passed through Sioux Falls South Dakota. We pulled into an old salvage yard. The house was old but still looked kinda homey. An older man walked out on to the porch.   
“John Winchester, what a surprise to see you here. How the hell have you been?”  
“I’m good Bobby. How about yourself?”  
“I’m gettin’ older. How are your boys?”  
“Sam’s at college. Deans off hunting somewhere.”  
“So if it’s not babysitting what brings ya here?”  
“I just needed a place to train a new one.”  
“John, do you have another kid I don’t know about?”  
“Not that I know of. This is Y/N she’s been helping me out lately.”  
“Pleasure to meet you Y/N. I hope you enjoy your stay in the Singer hunter’s motel.”   
“I’m sure I will thank you.”  
We trained all day. I was getting good with a bow but still needed lots of work with the guns. We had skipped lunch so by the time the sun was starting to set I was starving.  
“John can we please go in? It’s getting dark and I’m starving.” I begged.  
“One more shot with the sawed off to prove to yourself that you can do it then we can go in I swear.”  
“Fine!” I shot the gun and hit the target.  
“Can we go in now?”  
“After you.”  
We had a wonderful meal of pork chops and beans. We spent the rest of the evening sitting at the kitchen table sipping cold beers. It was wonderful but my eyes were starting to get heavy.  
“I’m going to bed. I’m really tired.”  
“Good night sweetheart. Good work today.” Said John  
“Thanks goodnight.”  
I went upstairs and put my PJ’s on, brushed my teeth, and headed to bed. I read for a while and then I got thirsty. I went back down stairs but I stopped when I heard John and Bobby talking.  
“So really you’re gonna keep her around? The John knew would have dumped her at the nearest bus station. Getting soft with old age?” I heard Bobby say.  
“Can’t you see it? There is something really special about that girl. I just like having her around.”  
“All I hear is bla bla bla I love her.”  
“Yeah maybe, I just want to protect her.”  
“Are you worried what happened to Mary might…”  
“DON’T YOU TALK ABOUT MARY!”  
“Whoa John, I’m sorry. I lost my wife too you know.”  
“I just want her to have a good life. I have to get her out of mine. Ugg why did I ever let her in. I knew I would fall for her. “  
“John, don’t push her away. Talk to her. Ask her what will make HER happy.”  
“I just don’t know. I need some sleep. Night Bobby.”  
With that I tiptoed to my room as fast and quietly as I could. I got into bed and pulled the blanket around me. My door opened and someone walked in.  
“Y/N can I sleep with you?” said John  
“Yeah.” I replied.  
He lay next to me. Maybe I did like him. He treated me very well. I deserved to be treated well. I liked him. Maybe it was love. I didn’t want to be left alone again. I wanted to be with John. I wiggled closer to him. He eventually put his arm around me and pulled me closer. After lying like this for a while I turned over and kissed him. He kissed back. Then he jerked away.  
“Y/N no it can’t be like this, Hunters lives don’t end well. You deserve a good life.”  
“Yeah so what. I don’t get to choose my life. What if I want this life? Shouldn’t I get a chance to have it? You don’t always have to make decisions for other people. You don’t have to hold all that guilt. Destiney can’t be controlled by anyone. Please John give me a chance to be happy.”  
“You can’t understand. You can’t be happy when you’re dead. If you stay with me I will have to bury you. I won’t do that. Women I love end up dead. I can’t lose you.”  
“You don’t know that. You haven’t loved anyone since Mary. I don’t know exactly what’s gonna happen if we stay together but we will both be lonely if we separate. I want to be with you John. You make me stronger.”  
“Mary was my everything I idolized her. We had two beautiful sons and a normal life. Then she was killed by a demon. Burned alive. I tried to save her but I couldn’t. I saw the fear in her eyes. I felt it. I loved her so much. I was ruined. I took my boys childhood away from them. Dean grew up to fast. The lost a father and gained a General. I damaged them. I can’t allow myself to get close to anyone. Who knows what I would do if I lost them. I love you Y/N. That’s exactly why I have to stay far away from you. I’m a bomb, you’re the fuse.”  
“A bomb does no harm if the fuse is never lit.”  
“That’s exactly why you have to stay away from me.”  
“No John. Now it’s my turn. I was nothing, I had nothing. Then you found me. Now I have hope and a purpose. I was in a really bad place. You took me out of that. You lifted me out of that and gave me solid ground. Don’t pull that ground away from me. I need you I need you so much. I can see that you need me too. We can support each other. Why would you take that away?”  
“I would rather see you depressed then dead. I need you to be alive. I can’t be near you Y/N because I already love you.”  
“John it’s late and we are both tired. We can’t make a decision now. Let’s get some sleep and talk tomorrow.”  
“I’m gonna sleep downstairs.”  
“John wait. I know what you’re doing. I’m not stupid. If you’re not sitting at the breakfast table tomorrow I will know that there is no hope for us. John I will always love you.” I said.  
“I know.” He said.  
Despite the fact that I thought I would never see him again I slept pretty soundly. Maybe it was because I felt safe at Bobby’s or maybe it was because I didn’t want to hear him drive away.  
I woke up and went down stairs. I walked slowly in to the kitchen praying that he would be sitting the table. There was only Bobby. I started hyperventilating. I ran outside. His truck was gone. I screamed. I started running. My feet pounding on the gravel road he was gone. Long gone. I fell on the ground, sobbing. How could he do this to me? How could he just leave me here?   
I felt strong arms wrap around my body. Bobby? I opened my eyes and saw him.  
“John how could you do this?” I said pounding on his chest.  
“Y/N, Y/N. I’m here. I’m never leaving you again.”


	3. The end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Years later you and John settle down.

I had never been more in love with John Winchester then I did at this moment. We were driving up the drive was to our new farm house. It took a few years to convince him to stop hunting but it was well worth the wait. He killed the yellow eyed demon and let his boys take over. Now we were moving to a farm! I wanted to live in the city but John wouldn’t have that. He said that he could protect me from demons but people are unpredictable. So we bought a farm. An old couple were selling it. They knew they had to leave the farm life but they didn’t want it to get plowed under and used for field crops. So we bought it. There are animals on it like chickens, a few cows, two horses, a ton of cats, and my favorite part three big old farm dogs.  
We got out of the car and John started putting devil traps by every door and window.  
“John you don’t have to do that anymore. We’re safe.”  
“Y/N I may have quit the job but that doesn’t mean we’re safe. I was a good hunter that means I have made many enemies we have to be ready for when they come.”  
“So we just gave up a life of searching for monsters to a life of waiting for them to attack us?”  
“No. We just have to be prepared.”  
“Prepared? Prepared John? We have been ‘preparing’ for an attack our whole lives. We just need to relax. We need to be able to enjoy part of our life without being scared.”  
“Y/N you’re right. I feel the same way. Just let me put these traps up for some peace of mind. I love you and need to protect you.”  
“Ok John but Im going inside to unpack boxes. If I find any guns or other weapon things I’m hiding them.”  
“Fair enough as long as you know where they are I’m fine with that.”  
I went inside and unpacked making the farm house seem as homely as possible. I put doilies on tables and hung up embroidered curtains on most of the windows. I went outside and got lots of wild flowers. I filled up many vases with them and placed them all over the house. I put lots in the bedroom. I looked out the window and saw John hard at work on the farm. He had got a saddle on the horse and was now out in the pasture bringing the cattle home. I started to cry. I never knew it but deep inside I knew that this was what I wanted. The man I loved riding a horse on our farm. I put tea candles in our bedroom and lit them. Then I went down stairs to start making dinner. I took a jar of tomato soup out of the pantry and made some grilled cheese. Then I went looking for more candles I found three tall dinner candles and lit them and placed them in the center of the table them I put the soup in fancy bowls and cut the grilled cheese in half and set the plates on the table. When John walked in I ran to him and gave him a big hug and kiss.  
“I could get used to this.” John said.  
“Used to what Mr. Winchester?”  
“Having a lovely wife to come home to, getting a romantic home cooked meal, and the kissing is pretty good too.”  
“Ummmmm I think I have been telling you that for a long time.”  
“All the hunters don’t even know. This life is so much better. Y/N I’m never moving again.”  
“Good. I won’t let you buy another house.”  
“I love you so much.”  
“I love you too.”  
“Let’s eat.”  
We ate till we were full. We had good conversation and many laughs. It hadn’t always been like this. There was a time when John hardly ever talked. He didn’t want to eat meals with other people and he would never dare settle down. I don’t want to sound self-absorbed but I think it was good he met me. Ever since I was little I wanted to settle down and have kids. This was the right time. This was the right place and, by God, this was the right man. We washed the dishes and then went to bed.  
“Y/N this is romantic.”  
“Yeah I tried. John have you ever thought of having kids.”  
“Well yeah I have two kids.”  
“I meant with me.”  
“Honestly I think of that a lot. I want you but I don’t think the timings right.”  
“John the timing has to be right. We are gonna get to old and then we won’t have that option.”  
“I love you but tonight’s not the night. I want to be with you and just you. I love you so much and I don’t want to ruin that with a child. I ruined my boy’s life. I can’t do that to your child. I just can’t. I love you to the moon and back but I don’t want to take a chance with another human’s life.”  
With that we decided never to have kids again. We grew old together. We did become foster parents. We saw many pained kids walk through our doors we did what we could to help. We helped some but others left the same as they had come. But through it all we always had each other.


End file.
